By Luis Pagan
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April 28, 2023
I didn't consider this question until it was time to explore it at 16. My parents placed us (sister) in Catholic School since 1st grade...St. Luke's. Why? Our mom thought it'd be a safer place to learn growing up in the South Bronx during the 80s. We lived on 141st Street and Cypress Ave where crack was sold right on our stoop of the five story walk-up. I remember that 3 bedroom railroad apartment like it was yesterday. So many good memories and a few scary ones too. Naturally we completed all our Sacrements. Only Matrimony remained. But it was too soon for that being in high school and all. But, what I faced next was something I didn't expect. I've done all the rituals, attended many masses, and considered becoming an altar boy and even a priest! Well, I knew the priest thing wasn't going to happen because I liked girls too much. :) But then I started to wonder, is there more to religion? Is there more I can do to exercise my spirituality without becoming a priest? I felt it in my gut there was more. That I could do more to express myself spiritually. So I started to explore. I started to ask people, my elders and others. I really don't remember what they advised me. I do remember exploring the new age section at Barnes 'n Nobles. I was blown away with all the knowledge available and the different spiritual practices to explore. I became interested in doing magic. Not Las Vegas magic silly! I'm referring to spells and rituals to help ensure success in my daily endeavors, protection spells, love spells, and more! I was so intrigued, I wanted to learn it all. But, I knew that would overwhelm me, so I decided to seek out a spiritual practice that is connected to my Puerto Rican heritage. At some point I remembered a place called the Botanica. I don't recall anyone taking me there as a boy, but I knew that was the next stop in my journey. I went to the one on Webster Ave. You know the one close to Sears on Fordham Road. Original Products it's called. It's still there! Right before walking through the front doors, I remember feeling all this anxiety and filled with all these questions like: Is this it? Will I find what I'm looking for? Are the answers to my spiritual questions behind these doors? Original Products is a supermarket for the super natural <--- see what I did there :) Aisles of candles, herbs, books, elixirs, statues, pictures, and more. Items for rituals and altars, beads and other items to carry on your body. They even have a spiritual reader you can see. You can buy stuff for your health, for protection, for love, to repel someone else, for guidance, for prayer...to name a few. Well, I couldn't leave without purchasing something that will lead me to the place where I was seeking. I needed to learn more. So I had to buy a book. But which one? There were so many! Finally, I picked a book about Santeria. That was 33 years ago. And with that purchase began my new spiritual journey. The cover you see above inspired this painting that I started in 2013, and completed in 2017.